It’s late to be spring cleaning, but I’m taking the weed eater to the collection of sticky notes that serve as my memory:
As longtime readers have probably realized, my wife is a bright, attractive, well-grounded, practical woman, who’s not prone to making questionable decisions. This being the case, longtime readers must also wonder why Karen married ... me.
Some might suggest my Robert Redfordian good looks, Cary Grantian sophistication and Bill Gatesian checking account were the attractions sweeping the woman off her feet. But those obvious traits aside, even I have wondered about that lapse in Karen’s otherwise sound decision-making, which recently led to our 20th anniversary.
See, when it gets down to the nitty-gritty, I’ve known me for 61 years and I’m not always a day at the beach. I have a tendency to hear the sound of many different drummers, and I easily drift off to a private place in my mind.
Once there, it’s difficult for someone else to retrieve my attention, which can strain a relationship.
Despite my best intentions, I also suffer from the male affliction of thinking the world should work like I believe it should. I can get frustrated when it doesn’t, but Karen rides out these moments of angst, bluster and confusion by reminding me, “Dear, the world doesn’t run the way you tell it to.”
We share many interests, agree on many things, but we are also quite different. Nothing wrong with that, because I’ve learned relationships survive, thrive and grow because of the balance you bring to someone else’s life. And that’s what Karen’s done for me — she is the yin to my yang.
I hope you can say the same, my love. Thanks for 20 loving, interesting and inspiring years, although I’m still not sure how you’ve done it.
n Some feel the flick Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter is disrespectful to the 16h president and deem it offensive. As a son of the Land of Lincoln and someone very weary of current pop culture fascination with vampires and zombies, I think the movie concept is ridiculous. But in the USofA Mr. Lincoln helped save, you have the right to be ridiculous.
n “The mob is man voluntarily descending to the nature of the beast.” Erasmus of Rotterdam, the 15th Century Christian humanist, made that observation.
n I hope to live long enough to hear a politician get up to give a speech and say, “You know, I’m not going to read this garbage somebody else wrote. Here’s what I really think.”
n Fried beer being sold at carnivals and fairs? Leave it to Texans to, uh, expand the culinary arts.
n A reader asked how 21st Century Technoman, the Luddite-ish curmudgeon who occasionally takes over this column, got his name. I can’t lie — 21st Century Technoman was borrowed from 21st Century Schizoid Man, a tune on the album, Court of the Crimson King, by the eclectic British rock group King Crimson.
n By the by, King Crimson alums include Robert Fripp, Bill Bruford, Adrian Belew and Greg Lake, who moved on to Emerson, Lake and Palmer. (I don’t know why I know these things!)
n “If you’ve got nothing, people will give you nothing. If you’ve got everything, they’ll give you more things.” Ringo Starr’s view of an inconsistent human reaction.
n The letters in the word “dormitory” can be rearranged to say “dirty room.”
n Note to moms who are frantically trying to stay young by looking and dressing like their teenage daughters: No offense, ladies, but it’s really not working that well.
n Residents in some British communities are upset about missiles and other weaponry being placed on buildings in their neighborhoods? Welcome to the reality of hosting the modern Olympic Games, y’all.
n According to the Social Security Administration, the most popular names for newborns in Oklahoma in 2011 were William and Emma. I would have sworn the winning girls name would be some variation of Kaley, my family surname, which many moms and pops are using as a first name for their female offspring.
n Credit this to the late Andy Rooney: “I’ve learned being kind is more important than being right.” Not exactly the prevailing philosophy in modern America, is it?
n If I were King of the Forest, a 61-year-old man would not have lost all the hair that was once on his legs, thus revealing a spider web of varicose veins that have replaced it. Is this somebody’s idea of a sick joke?!
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